Hey Sol Warriors! Happy Thursday! I know what you are all thinking. Kyy blogging early this morning, what is going on. Listen I have been trying to transition into something new and I will start it off with the New Year.
This week's topic is "Boundaries".
Today's topic is "Placing Your Boundaries".
I hope you have started working on your boundaries list because now it is time for you to actually put them in place. Having a boundary is like putting a wall up in between you and that thing. Well, let's not say a wall but a window. When you are placing your boundaries you have to be firm and stand by them. I was taught to treat people the way you want to be treated. As growing up and becoming an adult I have realized that it doesn't always work. You can be the nicest person to someone and they still treat you ugly. You can be the most positive person in the world and the ones you want to be positive about your moves are the most negative people around you. This morning I was talking to my girlfriend about boundaries and she brought up a good point to me. She said, "You have to start treating them how they treat you". So regardless if I am supportive of them or not if they aren't supportive of me then why am I supportive of you?
Now Brenda Joyce would not be happy about this because I am supposed to treat others kind with love and respect. But grandma, listen girl THESE PEOPLE GOT ME MESSED UP! We come to a time in our lives that standing up for ourselves is the top priority that we have to do. We have to understand that our feelings matter. We shouldn't have to walk around on eggshells because we are too afraid to speak up because of someone step over my boundary.
So put those boundaries in place and stand behind them. Stop allowing others to treat you any kind of way because they cannot handle their own trauma. It is not our responsibility to be "captain save a hoe" when we are barely saving ourselves!
“When you notice someone does something toxic the first time, don't wait for the second time before you address it or cut them off.
Many survivors are used to the "wait and see" tactic which only leaves them vulnerable to a second attack. As your boundaries get stronger, the wait time gets shorter. You never have to justify your intuition.” ― Shahida Arabi
If you would like to reach out to me you can do so via email at firstname.lastname@example.org, via DM on Instagram/Twitter at @apprehenlife, or via text (225)341-1672.