So, today is September 12. I am currently sitting in class typing this because I am feeling as if the world is watching me and I am stuck. I haven't been taking my meds nor have I been talking about my miscarriage as well. I have just been trying to keep myself busy and act as if nothing is wrong. When in actuality, I am in pain and I hurting, more so mourning. The one thing that I can say that is different than last year around this time, is that I am going to class, I am still being around on campus, I am still being social, and that I am talking about it to a certain extent. Last year, I literally stopped attending classes if it wasn't a test or something that had to be turned in I wasn't going to class. I wasn't on campus I was just either in class, at work, or at home. I normally go through things on my own but this year I am trying to let people in and have a support team with people that I trust.
As next Saturday approaches, I am trying my best to be there for myself mentally, emotionally, and physically. My sleep pattern is completely nonexistent. I have never been able not to go to sleep! Now I am staying up to 2 or 3 in the morning trying to figure out why I can't sleep. It sucks because I lost my sleeping pills and now I just take power naps and go on about my day. As the next week, comes along I am going to try to be able to have my updates a lot more frequent. If I don't then I will try to do so with my support group at the least.