Is Being Friendly Misleading?


Is being friendly leading people on? Honestly, I have never thought of this until recently. I was always told that I am too friendly, and I never understood that because I would just have normal conversations with others. I was taught that a smile could brighten up someone’s day and you would never know it. So I always took that into consideration. But now it seems like if you smile, hug, talk or text someone you automatically like each other. Whatever happened to getting to know somebody and being friends first before lovers? What happened to those late-night car rides and you end up parking in the abandon building parking lot and you talk until the sun comes up? What happened to have friends of the opposite sex AND just being friends?

Today’s society is extremely to “woke” for me and I can barely keep up with the new lingo. I do not mind having conversations with others but how am I supposed to know that these normal conversations that we are having are misleading you into thinking that we are going to have more than just a conversation? I could never be mean or rude to someone unless you have done something towards me and if you haven’t then I am willing to do whatever I can to help you out in your time of need. It is hard for me to be able to be kind to others because its either taken the wrong way. My personality isn't one that makes it seems as if you cannot approach me. I honestly would drop doing whatever I am doing to help somebody, and if I cannot help them I am finding somebody who will.

So, I did a poll on my Instagram and my twitter and asked my followers, "If being friendly is misleading?"

On Instagram, @Tragic_treb said, “Being friendly can be misleading because often times cunning and deceptive things come from a smile or friendly gesture. So, if you’re naturally nice and kind no problem, but sometimes ppl are nice to just go thru the motions of getting something like how some guys are nice for sex."

Also, on Instagram, @drop.dead.snoop said, "Then that’s on them. If they can’t distinguish if someone is genuinely a nice person or if they’re trying to get with them then they can’t be mad when someone says they have a significant other. Nice doesn’t mean they wanna fuck."

Another one of my followers on instagram, @peaches_andrews said, "because you can be friends and not attracted to that person. just because you're nice doesn't mean you wanna fuck or be with that person"

On Twitter, @_makeEMsayy said, "My response to your question is that it depends. Everyone has their own interpretation of things. One thing I can say in terms of a lot of women they will mistake a man’s friendliness for something more. The reason for this is that they don’t realize that they deserve friendliness/kindness so when they receive it they interpret as a man having interest & making them feel special."

Also, on Twitter, @experiment_625 said, "I said no because genuinely I believe we as a people should be friendly and nice to one another, so it shouldn't be seen as more."

I agree with everyone because yes it does depend on the parties. But how can we tell others that we are just being polite? Or that you are taking my kindness for flirtation. In every relationship or even situtationship that I have been in, it was always this issue for me. I was left to feel that I was doing my significant other wrong or dirty when I was just being nice. So, in my previous relationship, I started falling back from my friends and associates because I did not want them to think that I was flirting with anyone while I was just being Kyy. Later, I found out that I was just hurting myself in the long run because I wasn't getting the social interaction that I needed. I ended up going back to talking to everyone and being able to get that social interaction piece that I was missing.

With that being said, F*ck what anyone has to say and be true to you! We spend to much time worrying about what others think. Instead of what we know is going on. It's 2018 and if you cannot shoot your shot to whoever you are trying to get then you need to grow up! Time waits on no man. So, if you scared or always assuming that because a female/male is being nice to you is a gesture that they like you. STOP being scared and just ask them if they do or not. Rejection is okay. You have to get told no before you get told yes. It's life live for the no's in life and wait for that perfect yes.

#mentalhealth #relationships

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